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Ven Juin 08, 2012 15:04
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Sujet du message:  Eloge du pet Répondre en citant

Caca de fête, caca qui fouette

Certes, cet adage est parlant, illustré et vérifié par de nombreuses personnes accroupies sur leurs toilettes, les yeux hagard, qulques vertiges perturbant leur tête douloureuse et décoiffée, au lendemain d'une cuitasse bien appuyée.

Oui, la crotte sent fort le lendemain de la fête.

Mais bon sang, personne ne parle du pet qui précède tout cela! Personne ne s'est étendu sur cette odeur sulfureuse précédant l'arrivée d'un train de marchandise chargée des lourds déchets ingurgités la veille, lors de ces beuglements avinés que l'on peut observer de la meilleure façon qui soit chez les supporters toulousains du Stade!!!!!

Alors je vous le dis. Ce prout au lendemain d'une grosse fiesta, je l'aime. Je le chéris. Car mes intestins, flétris par l'alcool, par la bouffe sporadique que je me suis jeté dans le clapoir sans trop regarder de quoi il s'agissait, mon estomac dont la torture finale fut un kebab frelaté, servi à 3 heures du matin dans une misérable boutique dégoûlinante de graisse, mon intestin disai-je crie d'agonie.
Et lorsque miracle, ce vent se présente, venant du tréfonds d'un repli de mon anatomie interne, il est le bienvenu. Souvent émis sur un air de doute, car on ne sait jamais si une petite diarhée ne voudrait pas pointer le bout de son...nez, mais on se le tente à chaque fois.

Oui. Et quand il sort, bien sec, bien net et bien marqué, claironnant faisant éventuellement sursauter le chat assis non loin, c'est un véritable soulagement. L'intestin, le gros et le grêle, se replacent, soupirent d'aise (c'est le cas de le dire), tout comme son propriétaire.

Alors je vous le dis mes enfants, le pet de fête est une bénédiction.

Si seulement son odeur ne se présentait pas à nos naseaux!!!!

Oui le pet de fête fouette!! tout comme le caca qu'il précède! le caca n'ayant de mérite que d'être excrété dans les lieux d'aisance, ne dérange que l'odorat de celui qui le produit, tandis que le prout de fiesta est émis bien souvent au réveil, sous les draps de satin d'un sanctuaire de plaisir, visité par deux protagonistes énamourés... Aïe. Hélas! Le drap de satin se voile d'une onde trahissant la progression néfaste de la phéromone fécale envers les oreillers abritant morphée et les habitants de ses bras... Le narine de la nymphe se froncent, ses yeux papillottent, un grognement vaseux de bête à l'agonie s'échappe de ses lèvres... Ce n'est que lorsqu'elle réalise qu'elle est l'auteure du délit que honteusement elle referme les yeux, attendant sournoisement que son homologue mâle (ou femelle d'ailleurs) reproduise le même schéma, pour pouvoir se donner contenance et jurer par tous les dieux que c'est d'un romantisme tonitruant de se réveiller à ses côtés, bordel!

Bref. Passons. Le pet de fête, ça fouette. Mais c'est chouette. Sous la couette. Ça sent la Mouette et la mouffette...

Vivement demain soir, qu'on se la remette!
  _________________
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Sam Juin 09, 2012 7:25
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Sujet du message:   Répondre en citant

En fait, si j'ai bien compris, tu t'es mis à l'alcool à 90° c'est ça ? Very Happy Laughing
  _________________

"Tout le monde est le bienvenu ici.
Même ceux échoués par hasard en ayant recherchés la recette des nouilles au beurre !
Voir ceux que Google aurait dirigé par chez nous croyant trouver le secret de la longévité des palourdes."

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Lun Juin 11, 2012 12:28
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Nan. J'aime le pet. C'est tout! je pensais que ça trouverait sa place à la cave...
  _________________
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Lun Juin 11, 2012 15:02
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Localisation: Bouuuuh !!! Derrière toi !
 XP & Seven Jamais !!!!! Vive les Pingouins Libres ! Oué mais tout mourru le pov :(
 Y en avait pu en stock ! Un GSM non, mais un gros smartphone oui :p Le Pingouin !!! Le Pingouin !!! Le Pingouin !!! Un canard rose en plastique qui fait pouet pouet quand on lui appuye sur le ventre...
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Oh bah tu sais, à la cave y a tellement de place maintenant que tu pourrais lâcher je ne sais quel missile chimique qu'on le remarquerait même po ! Razz

Bah oui j'ai tout agrandi moi... Poussé les murs tout ça tout ça...
Creusé avec les dents pour de nouvelles galeries... J'en passe et des meilleurs...

Fallait bien que j'm'occupe Razz
  _________________

"Tout le monde est le bienvenu ici.
Même ceux échoués par hasard en ayant recherchés la recette des nouilles au beurre !
Voir ceux que Google aurait dirigé par chez nous croyant trouver le secret de la longévité des palourdes."

(c) Le Va
 
 
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Mer Juin 13, 2012 15:27
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Ah merde, t'as des dents?

Chavais pô... Les lutins, y savent que tu mords? because avec toute cette bave, on voit rien...
  _________________
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Jeu Juin 14, 2012 7:42
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Sujet du message:   Répondre en citant

Oué enfin des dents c'est un grand mot... Des p'tits bouts par-ci par là... Rolling Eyes Razz
  _________________

"Tout le monde est le bienvenu ici.
Même ceux échoués par hasard en ayant recherchés la recette des nouilles au beurre !
Voir ceux que Google aurait dirigé par chez nous croyant trouver le secret de la longévité des palourdes."

(c) Le Va
 
 
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Jeu Sep 08, 2016 13:22
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Le VA a écrit:
Oh bah tu sais, à la cave y a tellement de place maintenant que tu pourrais lâcher je ne sais quel missile chimique qu'on le remarquerait même po ! Razz

Bah oui j'ai tout agrandi moi prévoyances obsèques... Poussé les murs tout ça tout ça...
Creusé avec les dents pour de nouvelles galeries... J'en passe et des meilleurs...

Fallait bien que j'm'occupe Razz

C'est la première fois que je vois ce genre de discussion qui est à la fois marrante et amusante. Merci pour la bonne humeur
   
 
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Jeu Avr 06, 2017 15:57
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Le VA a écrit:
Oh bah tu sais, à la cave y a tellement de place maintenant que tu pourrais lâcher je ne sais quel missile chimique qu'on le remarquerait même po ! Razz

Bah oui j'ai tout materiel charcuterie occasion agrandi moi... Poussé les murs tout ça tout ça...
Creusé avec les dents pour de nouvelles galeries... J'en passe et des meilleurs...

Fallait bien que j'm'occupe Razz


Bonjour!
Je viens d'adopter un petit chiot mais je n'ai aucunes idées de comment le nourrir.
Merci!
   
 
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