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Mer Juil 30, 2008 13:30
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Avatar du mois supermat
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J'adore. Ces extraits ont apparemment été retrouvés sur un site où les gens viennent parler de leurs malheurs... Ily en a quelques uns plutôt gratinés!

Aujourd'hui, ça fera un an que mon copain m'a gentiment larguée après
> > m'avoir sautée une dernière fois. Quelques jours plus tard, j'annonce à ma
> > mère qu'il m'a quittée. Elle demande : "C'est parce que t'es grosse ?" »
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, et après une longue série d'examens, je viens d'apprendre que
> > je suis stérile... Ma femme est enceinte de notre deuxième enfant... Je
> > pense que je vais avoir des questions à lui poser... »
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, ma fille de 9 ans que j'élève seule devait faire une
> > rédaction sur la personne de sa famille qu'elle admire le plus. Elle a eu
> > 9/10 en composant un texte très émouvant sur Skippy, son cochon d'Inde....»
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, j'attendais tranquillement un ami à la gare, assis par terre
> > car aucun siège. Un homme âgé est arrivé et m'a insulté comme quoi si la
> > France va mal c'est à cause de chômeurs comme moi qui vivent sur le dos des
> > autres. Je suis étudiant. VDM.»
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, ma copine m'a offert le bouquin : le Sexe pour les nuls. .»
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, pour faire plaisir à mon mari, j'ai mis un porte-jarretelles
> > et des bas résilles, il m'a dit que je ressemblais à un rôti de porc
> > ficelé ! .»
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, je voulais faire peur à ma petite femme , en me cachant
> > derrière une porte et surgir tel un zombie.. Elle m'a dit : "Arrête il y a
> > ton ventre qui dépasse." »
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, mon patron m'a demandé :"Est-ce que je peux te faire une
> > petite critique constructive ?" Je lui ai dit oui. Il me dit alors :"C'est
> > vraiment de la merde ce que tu fais. T'as aucun talent et j'ai du mal à
> > comprendre pourquoi je t'ai embauché." »
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, mon tout premier stage d'externe en médecine, mon tout
> > premier patient de toute ma vie, il est mort alors que j'étais en train de
> > lui faire une prise de sang. .»
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, ma fille (5 ans) me regarde m'habiller dans la salle de bain
> > et me demande : "Dis maman, quand mes «tétés» auront poussé est-ce qu'ils
> > tomberont comme les tiens ?" »
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, j'allais annoncer à mon ami que j'étais enceinte. Juste avant
> > notre rendez-vous, ma meilleure amie, en larmes, a débarqué pour me dire
> > qu'elle couchait avec lui depuis deux mois. »
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, je reçois une lettre de la CAF, me signalant que je leur dois
> > 250 euros. Ne comprenant pas ce qui se passe, je décide de les appeler :
> > effectivement il y a une erreur, je leur dois 1 200 euros. »
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, j'ai reçu deux SMS de ma copine. Le premier pour me dire que
> > tout était fini, le second pour me dire qu'elle s'était trompée de
> > destinataire. .»
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, j'ai mis des commentaires sur mon propre blog avec des
> > pseudos différents pour faire croire aux gens que j'ai des amis... »
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, comme hier et comme tous les jours depuis vingt-cinq ans, je
> > m'appelle Sandy... Je suis un homme... »
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, j'ai eu une évaluation de 100 mètres haies. A l'arrivée, la
> > prof me dit : "C'est mauvais ! Comment tu feras si les flics te courent
> > après ?" Je suis Tunisien. »
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, une amie à moi a décapité son chat, en fermant sa baie
> > vitrée»
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, j'ai ramené un copain à la maison et j'ai voulu le présenter
> > à mon père. Ne le trouvant pas, j'ai cherché dans toute la maison "Papa ???
> > Papa ???" Et là, venant des toilettes, la grosse voix de mon père a rugi :
> > "Je chie !"
> >
> > «Aujourd'hui, mon boss rentre dans le bureau et me demande : "Alors en ce
> > moment t'es sur quoi ?" Je lui réponds : "Sur le départ." Il a dû oublier
> > que je venais de me faire licencier... Vie de merde !.
  _________________
C'est en potant qu'on devient potiron

Et pour ceusses qu'y z'ont pas de favoris sur leurs nordis... http://momatt.free.fr

 
 
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Mer Juil 30, 2008 15:33
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Avatar du mois Le VA
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 Y en avait pu en stock ! Un GSM non, mais un gros smartphone oui :p Le Pingouin !!! Le Pingouin !!! Le Pingouin !!! Un canard rose en plastique qui fait pouet pouet quand on lui appuye sur le ventre...
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J'adore Laughing Laughing Laughing
  _________________

"Tout le monde est le bienvenu ici.
Même ceux échoués par hasard en ayant recherchés la recette des nouilles au beurre !
Voir ceux que Google aurait dirigé par chez nous croyant trouver le secret de la longévité des palourdes."

(c) Le Va
 
 
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Mer Juil 30, 2008 17:19
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BBwonder
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ptdr
  _________________
LA CAVE POWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA !!!  
 
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Mer Juil 30, 2008 23:13
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Diabolo...
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ptdr
  _________________
alucard lalalila, lalalila, lalalalilo, gennosaïdooo.... alucard 
 
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Jeu Juil 31, 2008 9:53
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Près des étoiles
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Ben il y en a vraiment qui ont le sens de l'humour pour le raconter!!!! Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

et l'adresse du site c'est quoi??? Wink
   
 
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Ven Aoû 01, 2008 7:29
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Vie de merde sur google et tu vas tomber sur tout un tas de sites dans le genre. J'y ai passé un moment, il y en a qui sont vraiment drôles!
  _________________
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Et pour ceusses qu'y z'ont pas de favoris sur leurs nordis... http://momatt.free.fr

 
 
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Sam Aoû 02, 2008 1:11
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falcorth
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CKLR que y'a du dossier là !!!!! Bien vu !!!!
  _________________
Mon FLICKR
 
 
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Sam Aoû 02, 2008 12:52
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J'ai pas pu attendre ta réponse, j'avais cherché et trouvé, j'ai passé mon jeudi au boulot là-dessus! MDR! ptdr
   
 
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Sam Aoû 16, 2008 1:25
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Steeray
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 2K / XP T|T3 SE K750i Yeeeeeeessssssssssssss.... 


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excellent ce site

et finalement en lisnt tout ça on se dit qu'on va pas si mal que ça Smile
  _________________
Il faut manger pour vivre et non vivre pour manger. Bien que...
Quand a lieu la prochaine Refuge Party ?
http://s4.bitefight.fr/c.php?uid=61476 
 
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Dim Aoû 17, 2008 13:49
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 moutain lion ah, en, non en fait 'y a plus :/ et puis qoi encore?? iOS 6.1.4
 


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Laughing pareil, je me suis dit que d'une manière générale, j'échappais
à plein de choses Laughing
  _________________
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Jeu Sep 11, 2008 10:12
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excellent !!
Pas mal le coup de la stérilité du monsieur Laughing papa de 2 enfants Laughing Laughing
  _________________
Super Caviste  
 
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Dim Avr 29, 2018 7:18
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Where's my Grappa?
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Dim Avr 29, 2018 7:26
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Lun Avr 30, 2018 23:32
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